If She Walks Like a Duck . . .

 I felt a tug on my shirt.

“Teacher, did you poop your pants?” asked the little boy in my kindergarten class.

Although, the surprise may have registered on my face, I waited for what came next, knowing that he had to have a good reason for asking that question.

“Well, you’re walking like this.” He then proceeded to demonstrate my distinctive walk.

He wasn’t done, though. “My brother walks like that when he poops his pants.”

Children are honest. To quote Bill Cosby, they do “. . . say the darndest things!”

You see, I was waiting for a hip replacement, which resulted in a very distinctive way of waddling, er, walking. Although this anecdote is humorous, there is nothing fun or funny about the pain of a hip that needs replacing. Left untreated, the joint deteriorates to the point where it becomes a grinding of bone on bone. It is extremely painful and hard to get relief, whether sitting, standing, sleeping or moving. I am astonished that a hip replacement is considered elective surgery; in my experience, the alternative would be zero quality of life.

I can usually spot a deteriorated hip socket walk. Can you?

Image courtesy of Joanne Wilson.

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7 Responses to “If She Walks Like a Duck . . .”

  1. I’m amazed that anyone can walk at all with bad hip joints. When mine is flaring up in the groin area, I can’t move in any direction that it doesn’t cause tremendous pain. When it’s the outer part – I think that’s usually the bursa – it’s quite a bit easier, but still far from easy. I hope things are better for you now.

    • I often think about what people did when hip replacements hadn’t yet been conceived.

      I hope that you don’t often have that hip/groin/leg pain.

      New hips – new lease on life!

  2. my hips fused when I was 14 and I spent two years lying in a hospital bed, waiting for custom-made hip replacements. Getting that surgery was one of the best things that ever happened to me – I hopped into a wheelchair and went home and started living my life.

    • I remember waking up from surgery, amazed at how I had less pain than when I went in to the hospital. Those hip prosthetics are magic and like you say – renewing!

      Oh, two very long years! I’m so sorry that it took so long. Your resilience is amazing.

  3. You bet I can. There are some rascals in my family and circle of friends who delight in waddling like I used to pre replacement/revisions.

    But this is new.

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